15 weeks post augmentation..........

...........and things are improving.

Apologies for having been 'absent' from this blog.  I have been inordinately busy with my business but also trying not to obsess about righty.  Just leaving my breasts alone to do their thing seemed like a good idea.

A number of people have contacted me asking for an update, and recent pictures, to see how righty is shaping up.  I have taken some snaps this morning and have included them in this post.

Looking at the pics I took at 7 weeks I can definitely see improvement (especially in righty).  

Although righty is clearly smaller than lefty (this is especially irritating as righty was the breast that was reduced in the first op), the issue with the underside of my right breast forming a 'w' shape instead of a 'u' shape is - thankfully - resolving :).  

With regard to the size difference I have deliberately gained weight to see if that would even out the two breasts (I know women who have breast reduction ops are often disappointed that - with weight gain - their breasts accumulate fat most readily and regain size easily) .  For me gaining weight did not result in an evening out of size between righty and lefty; and I am now busy getting that weight off again (Mexico holiday booked 28th June so I'm working hard!)

The size and shape difference is more noticeable in the photos than in 'real life' (if that makes sense).  I guess because they are being 'framed' and observed face on.  I had to point out to husband the issue.  He hadn't noticed (despite spending a lot of time studying my new boobies!!!)

15 weeks post augmentation

left side

right side

All in all I am chuffed to bits with my new boobies.  The scars are healing better than I could ever have hoped.  I love being able to go braless and the fact that when I remove my bra my breasts remain up on my chest!

Oh yes........!

I am still wearing a MACOM bra at night and I probably always will.  I want to 'protect' my new boobies from sagging prematurely (again!!); and supporting them close to my body as I sleep seems like a precaution that might assist with that.  I also religiously wear sports bras when I do any exercise (shamefully I never bothered with them before).   I even strapped myself in when I did a few hours gardening the other day :).

I am now permitted to wear underwired bras and it is such a joy to be back in lovely lingerie.  Happily my size is 34F/G so a lot of the many, many bras I have from pre-op fit me well.

I have absolutely no pain (have not had any since a few weeks after the augmentation op) and nipple sensation is continuing to increase/return.

Clinic appointment with Mr Russo yesterday......

.........has reassured me a little.

When I showed him the problem with righty he assumed I'd had an infection there. I told him not. He looked puzzled.

I told him that the issue seemed to have occurred after drains were removed. He explained that when the drains come out, any air trapped in the breast is sucked out too.

Mr Russo said that my skin will stretch and the deformity will go in time. He then asked me to stand infront of him so he could look properly - he looked perturbed (bit alarming) and again asked me if I'd had any infection there. I repeated that I hadn't and reminded him I was only a little over three weeks post surgery and that my incisions have healed very well.

He then tortured me a bit (he is a titty sadist!!); forcing his fingers either side of righty's scar (in the middle where the problem is) he pinched painfully and said there was a lot of internal scarring and that was the problem. Pulling downwards he squeezed/massaged the internal scarring and said "can you feel that?".

My internal response was: "you mean the searing agony that feels like you are ripping my breast in two??? erm..... YES of course I can feel it!!"

That's what I thought and yet I said: "yes".

He said I could manipulate the internal scarring in that way myself and it would help.

What he did was very painful and I was concerned he might have ripped my scar open and that I'd be purple/yellow/green with bruising. When I checked, however, I wasn't bleeding or bruised and he has, infact, made a positive difference and the suture line has flattened out a little.

It is painful, but I have been trying to massage the internal scar tissue near the indentation on my right breast. My fingers are - metaphorically - crossed that my doing so regularly will resolve the deformity issue.

The mastopexy scars (on the inside edge of both breasts) are becoming quite raised so I have resumed firm massage of all my scars.

Mr Russo wants to see me in a couple of months so he can see the final result and take some 'after photos' for his records.

Feeling more hopeful.......

..........today :)

Since my appointment with the nurse on Tuesday (around 30 hours ago) my right breast has significantly improved in appearance.

Perhaps the dressings being removed has had an impact, maybe my having booked an appointment with Mr Russo on Monday has terrified it into behaving ;), or it might just be the implant is dropping into position.  Whatever the reason the deformity has definitely started to even out.

Righty is far from perfect but the improvement in the last two days is very noticeable.  

Maybe I won't need revision surgery after all?  Fingers crossed.

I am trying not to obsess about my tittys; although that's easier said than done.  I'll take some photos on Sunday (I'm away in Belfast working from tomorrow until then) and hope the improvement in righty is apparent in them.

Two weeks post augmentation...........

.............and, physically, I am feeling absolutely fine. I'm back to pre-op energy levels and for 90%+ of the time I totally forget I had surgery two weeks ago.

I've had a very busy week at work and have been away from home for most of it. The last two nights were spent in hotels and laying flat on my back to sleep. Back ache (like I had after the first op) was a real problem last night. I'm home again now so I'll be sleeping upright on my chaise lounge again. I have rebuilt my 'pillow fort' and am snuggled into it as I type :).

I've mostly tried to not look at my breasts this week - thus no photos. Righty is still deformed and I find it upsetting to look at it so, for the most part, I haven't. I cannot do anything to change it so obsessing won't make any difference.

I watched 'Botched up Bodies' on television last night. It's about cosmetic surgeries that have gone wrong. The series started the night before my op; for obvious reasons I decided it wasn't a good idea for me to watch it that night. There were a couple of women on last nights show having 'botched' breast surgery corrected by consultant surgeons. I am beginning to wonder if that will be my future.

Mario Russo still hasn't responded to my email. I sent it 12 days ago. I don't expect to receive a response now. I will see the nurse on Tuesday and will express my concerns to her and especially my disappointment that Mr Russo has not had the courtesy to even acknowledge my email. I will ask if I can forward the email to her and ask her to forward it to Mr Russo.

Trying to remember...........

Awaiting Mr Russo at Dolan Park........

.......once he has arrived and seen me (and his other patients I guess). I will have the drains removed and will be able to go home.

The poor driver has been sent away by the nurses (he was booked for 7am) and is now having to hang around waiting to take me home.  Not a lot of fun for him. I guess he drove someone in early this morning and only after dropping me home will get to clock off. 

I'm feeling okay. Got some sleep. Not a lot but that's to be expected.

Have had some painkillers this morning as my breasts were very achy when I woke up. Anticipating the drive home (and my ouchie, ouchie experience post-uplift of cars) I thought it pertinent to utilize the strong painkillers the hospital administer. I have been given some co-codamol to take home - the nurse told me they are not as strong as the ones she gave me at 06.30 this morning. 

Also taking anti-biotics for the next week to stave off any potential infection.




INSTRUCTIONS FROM NURSE:

• Post-op bra to be worn - day and night - for 6 weeks.
• Need to keep dressings / wounds dry for at least a week (until after my first wound-check appointment with nurse). 
• Not to lift anything heavy or to stretch my arms above my head for a couple of weeks. 
• Change bra daily and keep breasts clean and dry.

11 days to go to my augmentation surgery!!!!

Review appointment with Mr Russo......

...........has left me feeling a little deflated; our meeting lasted less than 5 minutes and was, largely, an opportunity for Mr Russo to admire his work.  If I had known what the appointment would entail I certainly would not have rushed away from the conference I was speaking at this morning to attend it.

I have not got a date for my second surgery as I had hoped.  That surgery will not be scheduled for a number of months. At my initial consultation I definitely heard Mr Russo say that he would be willing to perform the second operation as little as six weeks after the first. I am not sure if I misheard or simply misunderstood but today he was talking in terms of 6 months, not weeks.

On the plus side Mr Russo is totally thrilled with the results thus far and is very happy with the way I am healing.

When I arrived at the clinic I was taken straight in to see Mr Russo.  He gave me a hug and kisses on each cheek hello, and asked if he could have a look at my breasts.  I, of course, said he could and I removed my top and bra.  He looked simply delighted with his 'work' and said the result could not have been better. He had a bit of a squeeze and prod and then took some photos for his records.

I asked about the potential timing of the second op and he said for me to come back and see him in early January and that, if the scars were well enough healed, we would schedule for late January.

He said he was now certain doing the procedure in two stages was definitely the right decision for me and that the scarring will be minimal and my final result will be "just lovely".

He scrunched my right breast - ouchie - to push the tissue upwards and said the implants would give me that look and asked if that was what I was hoping for.  I agreed that it was.

I got dressed and asked if he would be willing to meet with me in early December and discuss the possibility of surgery later that month.  I explained that December is a quiet month for my business and scheduling surgery and time to recover will be much easier than in January.  He agreed and said he would have to see how my scars are healing at that point but that he would certainly consider it.

He again said how pleased he was with the way I am healing :)

He said I can bathe and swim and do anything else I have been avoiding (I can't think what he is referring to!)

To be honest the way Mr Russo handled my boobies today has given me a lot of confidence to let hubby have free reign with them.  Hubby would never be so rough with my breasts and if my surgeon is happy to handle them without concern of causing damage/harm I don't think there is any reason to treat them as if they are made of glass any longer :D.

Lots of driving ahead of me today, I'm getting prepared.....

.........for a day of pain.

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I am looking at a round trip of 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 hours today (Friday afternoon on M25 and over QEII Bridge so who knows??)

Driving quite simply hurts.  The vibrations cause my breasts to move (internally and a little externally) and the suture lines to rub against the inside of my bra - ouchie, ouchie, ouchie!!

Where roads are badly maintained, with potholes or speed humps my car turns into a boobie torture chamber!!

Yesterday I postponed a work commitment that required me to drive for a few hours.  Today that simply isn't possible.

I am planning to utilise Hippo to hold the seatbelt in a more comfortable position and to wear sports bra done up as tightly as I can bear AND to add additional support (and I think glamor ;) ) I will wear a compression bra (maybe two) over my clothes whilst I am actually in the car.

Note to self:  must remember to remove compression bra before I get out of the car......

my motto for today

Three week tittiversary and a major milestone........

......... moments, even minutes, without pain/discomfort/awareness of 'ouchies'!!

A while ago I was sitting here, getting on with some business admin, when I became conscious of the fact that I was unaware of my breasts.  

No pain, no discomfort, no aching - nothing!

Even when I brought my attention to my chest I could not feel the suture lines - it was as if the cuts were not there at all.  For the fist time in three weeks I was entirely pain free :D

Bliss.........

I moved and the wounds made themselves known to me again but - not to worry - I experienced another episode of the absence of discomfort a few minutes later.  

The relief is heady.......... 

It wasn't until I was without pain that I fully appreciated how much it has been a constant companion; the first thing I noticed when I came round from the anaesthetic and again upon waking every morning since.

Appointment with nurse - feeling reassured :)

Having spoken to Caroline (the nurse who I saw at my second wound appointment) over the phone on Thursday, about the weeping from the wound on my right breast, I went in to see her today. 

Over the weekend my left breast has also been weeping - on and off - from the same place (where the vertical scar meets areola scar). 

Caroline examined me this afternoon and said all is well: no sign of infection.

She said the point where I am experiencing the weeping is a weak point on the suture lines and that what I am experiencing is just delayed healing. She looked at my wounds and said she suspected I was not reacting very well to the dissolvable thread used to create the suture line (internal stitches) and that I was healing more slowly as a result. 

She also explained the reason the skin on my breasts is so dry, and flaky, is down to the post-op swelling having stretched the skin and resulted in dehydration after the swelling subsided.

Once the scabs have all fallen off the suture lines I can begin massaging the scars to improve their appearance. They are still feeling much too sore for me to relish that thought at the moment though!

Yesterday was tough.......

I was back to work and had a very long day.  4 hour round trip drive to deliver a training day.  The training delivery I took in my stride, but the driving was not fun!

The vibrations, the seat belt, the steering and gear changes - ow, ow, ow, ow :(  At times my boobies felt like they were coming apart at the seams!  Painkillers were required.

I drove much of the way with my right breast in my left hand trying to add extra support and to comfort myself.

I was also very worried about the fact that my wound was still oozing amber coloured liquid.  I was afraid that maybe I had the beginnings of an infection.  I post on Breast Buddies forum for advice and the wonderful women on there offered reassurance and, at lunchtime, I phoned THG and Caroline (the nurse I saw on Tuesday) called me back.

She was very supportive and said, from what I described, she was not concerned and she suspected she had disturbed the healing when she removed the steri-strips and, more so when she snipped the end of the suture thread.  She recalled that the thread nearest to where I was getting the discharge from had been tricky to cut.

She very much encouraged me to shower (I told her I hadn't because of the oozing and my concern about not being water-tight).  

I came home and showered - it was a disconcerting experience allowing the water to spray on my poor mutilated breasts!  I pat my breasts dry with a separate towel to the one I used for the rest of my body, used a hairdryer on 'cool' to ensure the wounds were properly dry and I lay on my bed for half an hour allowing the air to get to my wounds.

I put on a sports bra (much more comfortable and flattering than the Macom compression bra) and went out with a couple of girlfriends (Nandos then cinema).

When I got home I checked and there had been no oozing - YAY!!!

Just a little reminder to myself that........

Discomfort and feeling useless is getting me down......

....... 12 days is long enough!!

I am getting impatient to be healed and 'up to speed' again.  Earlier today I dragged a basket full of wet laundry from the washing machine to the line (approx. 30 meters) with my foot!

I keep having to remind myself that I am healing; and that - today - I am, no doubt, suffering the consequence of having done too much at the weekend.

I have my second wound appointment with the nurse tomorrow. She will probably remove the steri-strips and not replace them. I hope that will help ease some of the discomfort (the steri-strips are irritating my wounds in places).

Today has been a low point emotionally - ordinarily a bear hug from hubby would be the comfort I would seek :(.................

Home and resting......

.........finally :)

I arrived home at 10.30 (great driver brought me home - very chatty and interesting).  

When I got in I did too much (naughty me) unpacking and light housework bits and bobs.  I was very aware that I'd done too much as I was in pain :(

I took a couple of co-codamol (the hospital sent a box home with me) and have been sitting quietly since.

Lesson learnt: REST!! 



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Boob update:

I am experiencing burning in both breasts (more in the right), particularly along the boob crease and around the areola.

Pain down the side of both breasts and radiating up into my arms (my 'reward' for not resting when I first arrived home). 

Bruising is becoming more visible and my nipples are looking (and feeling) very sore.

The morning after........

BP went low again overnight (I suspect because I was asleep) but that meant Obs taken regularly and being urged to drink more water (which meant lots of trips to bathroom: T-Rex style).  All in all not the most restful sleep I've ever had. 

I'm in a little more pain today (laying flatter to try and sleep almost certainly put pressure on the incision sites (especially the big ones in my boob crease). I also have a very sore throat :( (breathing tube obviously scraped my windpipe during the op). 

I cannot wait for the nurse to take the cannula out of my hand. I loathe them and it cannot be removed soon enough for my liking!

I was told I'd be discharged at 05.30 so I've been up, dressed and packed for an hour. I suspect the nurse meant 06.30; which would make more sense with transport arriving at 07.00. At least I'm moving around, drinking and the likes which should satisfy her desire for my BP to raise.

I hope they don't insist I stay because of it - I cannot wait to get home. 

My children now know I've had the procedure done; I didn't tell them ahead of time because I didn't want them to worry about the anaesthetic etc.   I talked to my daughter last night (as she was staying with friends) and hubby told my sons (they are 20, 17 and 14 respectively). 

Interestingly now I'm clothed my boobs look a lot smaller than when I arrived yesterday. Part of that will be the compression bra - but some will be down to having lost volume during the op.  

I'm thinking it might be difficult to hide from observant folk - my breasts get smaller overnight and then a couple of months later (when I have the implants) grow again!  Oh well, I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.......... 

06.15

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On a very positive note today starts two whole weeks of R&R for me :). I run my own business and work 70hr+ weeks. I am so looking forward to not having anything I 'should' be doing other than resting, channelling my inner T-Rex, healing and trying to think up fitting names for my new titties :D

My inner T-Rex :)